I want to write about this pain
It’s too raw in my heart
Tapering deep into the centre
Tearing off flesh intertwined in ligaments
I want to mourn us
To blow smoke in the wind and say a prayer for us
The words can’t help
All that I manage is parted lips, trembling
With cloudy eyes that know how to rain salty water
I want to address this pain lodged deep and comfortable inside of me
Quivering my bones and haunting my soul
Bleeding me bare with emotions
I want to poke it, to stab it, to bleed it dry and end it’s existence
How do you hold something that lacks a form?
How do you kill something that is fueled by your existence
The pain of him
I love you
The beginning of my end
Words falling out your mouth like dewdrops from the sky
Feelings erupting from within me like a dormant volcano coming to life
Me, loving you without a conscience
You, trying to take it all back.
Old words being swallowed
New ones being said, ‘uncertain’ being at the forefront.
I’m not going anywhere. I won’t leave you.
Oh, but you did
You left the way you came
Tentative steps and speculations
Trying to lessen the impact of your absence
This hollow silence leaves me thinking of a what if
And unkept promises
Of a heart handed over with shaky hands
And returned to sender
Loving you more than this is an impossibility
As is hurting as much as this
The delicacy of my pain congeals into a hard boiled anger
And I want to tell you in definite terms and harsh words
I wish we were an occurrence that never was
My blood boils, my fingers type
My screen reads
I miss you
Because I do.
I recently read a piece about speaking out, on Livelytwist’s blog, which you can read here . It stirred certain feelings in me. This twenty first piece about Nigeria does the same.
If we all keep quiet, who would fight for us? In this interesting piece this writer wants a recognition from Motherland. This writer wants a better Nigeria.
What do you want from and for Nigeria, and how do you want to get it?
“I will ask questions with stones if they take my voice” – Odia Ofeimum
I will fight for a Nigeria I believe in
I will stand up against unfair practices and corrupt politicians
I will walk against the evil this nation has been known to sprout
I will speak for the weak and the down trodden
I will probe the rich and corrupt
I will believe this country can be better
I will stand…
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I realized its been over a year since I created this blog but less than six months since I had my first post. I’m not usually one to fancy writing about myself but I guess I have to try. New month, new me. Lol. Anyway, you should already know the types of stories or poetry I’m into and no, I promise I am not depressed. Although, I am going through some really major life changes that prove to be quite challenging but I am as happy and content as can be with life.
I came up with a really good idea for a story but it ended up being too long on paper and I hate long blog posts, so I decided to turn it into a series or something like that. My very first series ever! Kind of excited. Its in five parts so I shall post one everyday with the final post on Friday. I hope its good and you guys enjoy it. I shall begin to post random thoughts like this from time to time, for the fun of it.
Have a wonderful week.